Side Effects Include Dry Mouth, Nausea, and Humiliation

I haven't been able to get any writing done lately because of the activity and noise around my house. Our well sprung a leak, so a bunch of guys with heavy machinery are digging up my yard and driving me nuts. Oh, and I've had no water for over 24 hours now. Things are getting rank. And not just the guys.

Anyway, since I can't concentrate enough to write, I've been catching up on my soaps. I've been watching ABC soaps since I was in high school. Right now, All My Children is suffering from moron writer syndrome. The writers could probably benefit from one of the drugs advertised during the commercials that aren't hyping diapers, baby food, and tampons.

You know what commercials I'm talking about. The ones where some lady is twirling through a field of flowers while a deep male voice discusses the benefits of somesuchadine. It all sounds so wonderful. Until the increasingly serious side effects are listed in one long--but fast--sentence, as if the manufacturer can slip the nastier side effects by you, the bon-bon eating, couch potato soap viewer.

"Somesuchadine lasts all day. Side effects include dry mouth, nausea, sore throat, difficulty breathing, rectal bleeding, chest pain, blood clots, stroke, and heart attack. Some users may experience paralyzation of the arms and legs or blindness. Do not take if you have kidney damage, liver disease, or are breathing. Ask your doctor about somesuchadine today."

Right. Let me run right out and ask my doctor about that.

My favorite drug commercials though, are the ones that don't tell you what the drug is for. The commercial shows a woman eating a hamburger. Then a guy walking down the street. Then a couple feeding ducks. None of these things are related. A voice says, "Try mysteryavil. One dose of the pink pill will have you feeling like yourself again. Ask your doctor if mysteryavil is right for you."

Why? I have NO IDEA what the drug is for! How humiliated will I feel asking my doctor if mysteravil is right for me and he says, "Only if you are experiencing erectile dysfunction."

Hmm, I wonder if any of those guys digging up my backyard could use a small pink pill...

Friday, April 30, 2004 @ 03:09 PM CST [link]

Paying Dues

A comment from Creativegirl in my Time Out! post got my wheels turning. She says:

From my perspective, everyone who writes a book is a "real" author, whether I or anyone else likes their work. Why certain venues for publication should bestow "realness" upon some writers and not authors is just plain weird. Was Stephen King not a "real" author until Carrie was finally purchased after handfulls of rejections and several years?

Ah. This is something writers have asked even of themselves for...forever, I think. Was Stephen King a writer before he was published? Definitely. Was he an author before he was published? Dunno. People are always arguing over that issue, and I just don't want to go there right now.

But maybe this is part of the e-book issue for some people. There are a lot of people who don't consider self-published writers authors. Why? Because in their minds the self-pubbed author didn't "earn" the title. They didn't pay their dues of going through the hell of having their book rejected, revised, accepted, edited, etc., by a selective publishing company.

So let's move on to electronic publishing. How difficult is it to get published in that industry? (No, I'm not being sarcastic, so no more hate emails, please.) There are those who think it's super easy and therefore not real. The authors didn't pay their "dues." (Again, no hate mails, please. I'm trying to make sense of the thinking that has led to the attitudes.)

Now, what prompted my original question had to do with a contest in which someone said that the judge marked the "published" box, but then the remark of "Yeah, but she was probably e-published," came up.

Okay. Again, I'll bet this comes down NOT to the format in which the books are published, but to quality and dues. The contest entrant is thinking, "Is the e-book judge one of those talented ones, or was it one who can't write her way out of a paper bag but still got an e-book contract?" Because the entrant doesn't want someone who isn't a good writer judging her writing. Does that make sense? It's about perceived validity, I think.

There's no question that there are bad print-pubbed writers, but in many minds, because they are published by a large NY house, they've got the knowledge (if not the talent,) to get that contest entrant where they want to go. This is, of course, assuming the contest entrant wants published in print.

I may not be expressing this right, and I'll probably be ticking a lot of people off. (Hey, I should be used to that by now.) But I think that the perceived ease of getting published with an e-publisher, combined with editing that often takes a hit because the pay sucks in many cases, has led to the attitudes surrounding the industry.

Thoughts that don't involve my head on a platter?

Friday, April 30, 2004 @ 01:12 PM CST [link]

Time Out!

Well, it seems that I’ve opened a restaurant-sized can of worms. I’m kinda freaked out, actually. I wanted people to talk about electronic publishing, and, uh, they did!

I’ve gotten several private emails as well as blog comments, and I want to thank everyone who has voiced their opinions. I also got an email telling me that I needed to moderate better and stop the nastiness. My response? No way.

Everyone who has responded is an adult. They don’t need babysitters. And how can I ask for honest responses and then tell people to knock it off? Yes, things have gotten nasty in a few places, but there are also several intelligent, well thought out responses from both sides of the fence that make people think.

My goal wasn’t to gather pros and cons of electronic publishing (we’ve heard them a bazillion times,) but to find out WHY the industry is often scorned, and I’ve gotten some interesting responses. I’d intended to list some of those responses, but I think I’ll be crucified if I do. Someone will say that I was just looking for reasons to make e-publishing look bad, and that’s not true, so I’m not going to open myself up to attack. If you want to hear what I was going to say, email me privately.

Despite the stories I heard, I think that things ARE changing for the industry. As companies grow and become even more reputable, they seem to be hiring more talented, experienced, and educated editors. They are contracting more talented authors. Print published authors like Barbara Phinney are publishing e-books alongside their print books, which is no doubt giving electronic publishing a boost.

In case you are wondering, I have read several e-books. Works by Jodi Lynn Copeland and Terri Schaefer are among my favorites. I’ve been dying to read Combustion, by one of the people who commented to the original post, Denise Agnew. There are several other authors I’m going to try out because of their blog comments or private emails.

I also want to add that my post and poll was IN NO WAY intended to set print authors against e-authors. I was genuinely curious about attitudes that are expressed in the underground trenches but are never brought out into the open. And you know what? I’ve had a lot of e-published authors email me privately and thank me for bringing this up. Others think I’m some sort of evil pot-stirrer.

Would it be better to sweep all the underground rumblings under the carpet and keep them there like they have been for so long? Some would say yes. Others would say that only by learning WHY people feel the way they do can change be made. Shark researchers spend countless hours finding out WHY sharks sometimes attack people. Their research has helped reduce the number of shark attacks. That’s a good thing, right?

So isn’t finding out WHY electronic publishing has experienced negative attitudes ultimately a step in a positive direction? Only by talking openly and honestly can change come about. It’s nasty at first, yes. But in the long run, maybe the attitude gap will narrow.

Thursday, April 29, 2004 @ 11:08 AM CST [link]

E-book authors vs. print published authors

Recently, a friend discussed with me her scores from a manuscript she entered in a romance writing contest. She mentioned some really bogus comments and deductions she got, and I asked about the publication status of the judge.

She said the judge had marked the "published" box. Then she said, "Yeah, but she's probably e-published, not published for real."

I've heard that same comment several times. I've also heard a lot of complaints about RWA recognizing the e-publisher, Ellora's Cave, as a legitimate publisher, thereby allowing EC authors to call themselves published.

On the other hand, a lot of people have also praised RWA for recognizing EC.

And when it comes to e-book quality, there seems to be very widely varied opinions. Many people think of e-publishing as a "last resort" for anyone who isn't good enough to be published with a "real" publisher.

Thing is, no one talks about all this! It seems to be a totally taboo subject. Everyone fawns over the new e-book author, congratulating them on their success, but then you hear the whisperings of, "That e-publisher will publish anything," and "She only submitted to them because that story got rejected by Harlequin ten times."

No one discusses these things openly on lists--probably because the few times they've tried, flame wars of epic proportions began.

So I'm wondering...what IS the majority view on this? My curiosity has driven me to create a poll, so I'd love it if you'd click on the link to the right and answer the questions. I'm even thinking of writing an article about it, so feel free to email me your specific views!

Thanks!

Tuesday, April 27, 2004 @ 11:55 AM CST [link]

Movie Cliches

Some of my favorites:

If a person gets shot they have plenty of time to tell all kinds of things except the most important information (like the name of the murderer).

When foreigners appear in movies (hispanics in particular) they seem to be able to speak perfect english without making one single mistake except it seems they NEVER manage to learn how to say "Sir" or "Thank you"... they always say "Senor" and "Gracias"

In a spaceship battle scene, for a ship to fire a weapon at another, it must be in visual range. Even though the 20th century saw the advent of weapons that can be fired without visual contact, the people of the future have lost this technology.

After killing a bad guy or monster, he/it will always get back up and make one last try to kill you. Which is why, if I ever have to shoot an axe-wielding psycho, I'm going to chop off his head even AFTER I'm sure he's dead. Yeah, I'll have some explaining to do to the police, but hey, I'll prevent my own heart attack.

For an extended list, check out The Movie Cliche Site. Funny!

Oh, and thank you to Alison for giving me the freaky moment of the day: Subservient Chicken. That's creepy. I keep wondering if that guy is being paid, or if he was kidnapped, sewn into a chicken suit, locked into a tiny room and forced to do stupid crap. He's probably trying to tell us he needs help...

Wednesday, April 21, 2004 @ 09:34 AM CST [link]

Romance isn't alone when it comes to tasteless covers...

These are just bad: Top 10 Worst Album Covers

These are twisted. My favorite is the woman on the toilet: More "what were they thinking?" moments

Tuesday, April 20, 2004 @ 06:03 PM CST [link]

Not Enough New Ideas Lead To...RIP OFF!

Why kill yourself trying to come up with something fresh and original when you can just rewrite something that already exists?

A remake by any other name

Thursday, April 15, 2004 @ 08:49 AM CST [link]

SHAME on you, Canada!

For allowing and financing the cruel slaughter of the largest number of baby seals IN HISTORY. Today as yesterday, ten thousand seal pups as young as 2 weeks old will be beaten to death--or worse, left to slowly die or skinned alive.

And Canada WANTS this to happen and is trying to keep the public from seeing it.

Guardian Unlimited | Special reports | Outrage at new mass slaughter of baby seals

The Truth

What kind of sick people do this kind of work--and what kind of crooked bastards allow, no, encourage it to happen???

Tuesday, April 13, 2004 @ 07:39 AM CST [link]

How Mills and Boon Romances Became Comic Books

For some reason, the romance just doesn't translate for me...

BBC NEWS/Mills and Boon Romances in Japan

Monday, April 12, 2004 @ 05:01 PM CST [link]

Updates and Mangled Punctuation

YAY! I finally got my Doggie Bag page updated, which includes new myths, tips, and links. And miracle of miracles, I created a NEW web page. Yes, I did. All by my little self! I made a page for my archived myths, and I even created a link to the new page--and it works!

Baby stuff, to some of you web gurus, but major stuff for me!

Good news! I still feel like crap, but at least I have water again. I have no water pressure, but as long as the water is clear...I'm happy.

Mangled Punctuation

Does it make you insane to see a sign like this one I see at my grocery store? "There will be a $25 charge for all returned check's."

Grr.

Apparently, I'm a wanker for being so anal, but it's good to know that I'm not alone. Check out the #1 best seller in Britain:

Eats, Shoots & Leaves

Hehe--I can't wait to read it!

Friday, April 09, 2004 @ 04:01 PM CST [link]

Wanna Play Plastic Surgeon (and defile a work of art while you're at it?)

A friend (thanks, Warren) sent this, and it's just too fun not to share. I actually made the woman good-looking with one click of the scalpel on her nose, two injections of collagen, and a chemical peel!

FYI--my poor Doggie Bag page is suffering from a lack of updates, but I plan to update it by Monday. I've had the flu for the last couple of days and have been too foggy from cold medicine. Plus, there's a book I need from the local library that I can't go get until I take a shower, which has been impossible thanks to the idiots working on our well. My water is either completely off or hot cocoa brown. Thankfully we have bottled water to drink, but I can't wash clothes, dishes, or anything else.

What's really fun is that I had a load of laundry going when the well shut off, so when the water came back on the washer filled with muddy/rusty water and now all my clothes are brown. And yes, they were whites.

This sucks!

Wednesday, April 07, 2004 @ 12:52 PM CST [link]

King Arthur Movie

Mood: Excited!!!

Hollywood has a way of making the legend of King Arthur look stupid. I haven't liked any version of the story since Excalibur, and even that wasn't great for me.

But this, King Arthur, from Jerry Bruckheimer, the producer behind Pirates of the Caribbean, looks awesome! I highly recommend you watch the enhanced trailer. I can't wait to see this!

Oh, and tomorrow night Fox is re-airing the Simpsons episode, Diatribe of a Mad Housewife, that makes fun of romance writers. It's a must-see!

Saturday, April 03, 2004 @ 12:09 PM CST [link]