Whale Penises and Explosions

Only men would travel any distance to see the size of a dead whale's penis. Looks like the dead whale had the last laugh, though. Warning, rather graphic pictures of, um, a whale explosion...

MSNBC - Thar she blows! Dead whale explodes

Friday, January 30, 2004 @ 09:18 AM CST [link]

Writer Stuff

Well, I began a new novel yesterday. I'm still working on the manuscript geared for Harlequin Temptation, but my "nag buddies," Emma, Alison, and Lydia, talked me into starting the sequel to Emergency of the Heart.

So I started it, and so far even the plotting, which I normally HATE, has been easy. I think it's partly because I already knew the hero well, since he played a large role in the first novel. I also know exactly what type of woman he needs, since he's not exactly the most sensitive guy in the world.

So I've got a new novel in progress that I think I can turn into a stand-alone novel if I have to, but I really don't want to. I think I'd rather turn both novels into single-titles and work that way with them.

Now that I have two novels in the works, I'm stressing a little over time management. I'm not even working outside the home, and I still don't have all the time I want to write. Somehow though, I'll do it because I know so many authors who have more kids than I have, they have jobs outside the home, and they've got a gazillion other things going on and yet, they still manage to pump out up to 8 novels a year. I'm in awe.

One of my favorite articles on making writing a priority and getting those pages done is this one by Shirley Jump. Her advice to use your Crock Pot until it falls apart is my favorite. My husband is sick of Crock Pot meals, but he'll live. Probably.

I've also found the coolest stuff for writers. It's Vicki Hinze's Store, where she stocks such items as T-shirts, coffee mugs, mouse pads, book bags, and wall clocks that are plastered with fun sayings such as, "Deadline Hell Hostage," and "Warning! Mess with me and you'll pay dearly in my next book!"

I've sworn that the very day I get The Call, I'm going to splurge in that store.

Okay, enough goofing around. Must get back to the novels before guilt sets in!

Friday, January 30, 2004 @ 09:10 AM CST [link]

The Best Simpsons Episode...Ever

Last night, Fox aired a new episode of The Simpsons, called Diatribe of a Mad Housewife. The show is always making fun of something or other, and I get a kick out it when it makes jokes about the Air Force or Coast Guard.

Last night it made fun of TWO of my most passionate interests. Paramedics (Homer became an "ambulance driver"--training, what training?) and Marge became--get this--a romance novelist. Yes, the entire show made fun of paramedics and romance novelists. I haven't laughed that hard in a long time. My husband nearly hurt himself laughing (mostly at me,) which would have been unfortunate because do you think I'd use my "ambulance driver" training to help him? Not a chance.

From the author who inspired Marge to write (Esme Delacroix,) to the short scene of an editor making The Call to Marge, to the cheesy plot, title and cover of her novel, The Harpooned Heart, this was one of the best spoofs on writing I've ever seen. I wish I'd taped it!

Monday, January 26, 2004 @ 10:12 AM CST [link]

Celebrity "Authors"

My new Writer's Digest included an article about celebrities-turned-children's book authors, which was timely, since I'd seen an advertisement just days earlier for Madonna's newest book for tots, Mr. Peabody's Apples.

Madonna??? The woman who published the lovely coffee table book full of nude pictures, some showing her engaged in group sex? Oh, I'm going to leave skid marks in my driveway in my haste to run out and buy her children's book!

Actors act. Singers sing. Talk show hosts talk. WRITERS write. It's annoying enough when a singer starts acting or an actor cuts an album. Okay, there's a jealousy factor here, since I can't do either, and I give anything just to have ONE of those talents, let alone two.

But now some of those celebrities are penning children's books. Why? Do they feel an intense desire to write? Have they spent time actually LEARNING how to write?

If the answer to those two questions is yes, then okay, go for it. But I'd be willing to bet that in most cases, the answer is no--as evidenced by the poor reviews and the inability to go the long haul on bestselling lists.

Perhaps the goal for these celebrities is more exposure. More money. The cultivation of future fans.

Or maybe a lightbulb went off in their heads--the same lightbulb that seems to go off in everyone's head at one time or another. You know, that lightbulb that says, "Hey, I have lots of ideas that the world would no doubt love to hear, so I'll write a book. How hard can it be?"

Now, don't get me wrong; I'm not dissing celebrities and their talent. Whatever they do, be it acting, singing, or stand-up comedy, I'm sure they worked hard to get where they are. But for them to say, "Hey, I think I'll write a book. How hard can it be?" is like me saying, "I'm going to become an Oscar-winning actress. Acting isn't that hard."

Ooh, or maybe I'll go get myself a record deal. I can remember lyrics. I hum tunes. And right after that, I'm going to perform a triple bypass on someone. No problem. I've seen lots of episodes of ER.

Monday, January 19, 2004 @ 12:59 PM CST [link]

First Sales

The sudden flurry of writers reporting The Call has inspired me to add a Just Sold! section on my link sidebar. Check out the newest authors and the publishers who bought them!

Sunday, January 18, 2004 @ 01:48 PM CST [link]

Catching up

STUFF

Yeah, I'm catching up, but only so I can procrastinate working on the last draft of my screenplay, Right of Approach. But I also wanted to rave about an FTP program with a built-in html editor. It's called Coffee Cup FTP, and the thing is awesome. It's designed for morons like me, who have absolutely no website editing/building skills. At all. But with this software I can actually edit my own website. I'm sure I still can't do big things, but basic editing is a snap. I also tried their Pop-Up blocker, and it's fabulous. Right now the company is having a holiday half-price sale, (gotta wait for the pop-up, though! ) so with the money I saved, I ordered the cds to accompany the downloads.

WRITING

After the rash of Christmas rejections that took over discussion boards and chat loops, there now seems to be an exciting flurry of sales and requests for partials and fulls. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that my critique partners and friends who are so VERY deserving of "THE CALL" will soon hear their phones ring.

Oh, and fun news on the BBC. It's a device designed to give women orgasms at the touch of a button--after several minutes of ankle stimulation. Hmph. And people thought my heroine in Emergency of the Heart was weird for having sensitive ankles!

WEBSITE

The Doggie Bag page has been updated! And if anyone has any tips/tricks for me to add to the Tips section, please email me. Also, if you'd like any myths addressed, please feel free to ask. I have some fabulous pet expert/vet friends to help me debunk myths!

Hugs,

Larissa

Friday, January 16, 2004 @ 11:07 AM CST [link]

The Power of Rewrites

The movie, The Sixth Sense, was made from a script that had been rewritten ten times. It wasn't until the fifth draft that the writer, M. Night Shyamalan, realized that in order for the movie to work, Malcolm needed to be dead.

Off to do some revisions now!

Friday, January 02, 2004 @ 11:25 AM CST [link]